Woman - Marriage

I was married to the Duniya-but we have now divorced. I am now engaged to the Akhirah -but my desire to marry Jannah remains. I've rejected Jahannum's proposal and now, Jahannum and Duniya keep harrassing me. Instead of calling 911 & asking for a restraining order, I called upon Allah. Dunya & Jahannum haven't been arrested, so I'm constantly living in fear,but I won't let them ruin me.'--[ Habibi Halaqas ]

Daniel Sahuleka - I Adore You

I'm maybe not romantic
I'm maybe not poetic
sometimes I'm not that fluent
to find those magic words

I wish that I could show you my emotion
how can I give a notion
to use all my attention
to say how deeply I adore you

I hope you will forgive me
the moments when I'm clumsy
the truth is i'm uncertain
when we're about to make love

And my jokes they cover my confusion
though it's not my intention
to tease you with this nonsense
you should know
how deeply I adore you

Don't reject me
you could hurt me
although I seem so silly
but it'll hurt me
I'm maybe different
as you've discovered
but I'm getting warm inside
whenever you are near me
I'm no longer lonely
don't ever leave me
cause I can't stand
the coldness when you are gone

p/s: Love the lyrics!!

My Campus Life

'Time flies so fast'

Absolutely correct, I can not argue more. I spent my study for almost 5th semester, insyaAllah by next semester will do my internship. And then, i still have 3 more semesters to come for finishing my bachelor! yeay.

Seriously, i just can not wait any longer, i want to finish as soon as I can. I have many plans to do after my graduation. Works and master. But but but, when i tell this to my lovely ummi ( arabic word = mother) she always laughs!

She told me not to continue my study, the options is either work or married. There are the only options left. I used to explain her, while i can do my work and study at the same time, but she said it seems impossible to me, she knows how lazy I am! =p

For the married part, i can not say more, it is written. Sooner or later, only Allah knows best. :)

I want to continue my master in Engineering Management, i do not know why i choose that, it just sounds cool lol!

okay, this is weird post. =p

by the way, next month which is February, I will live separately with my lovely brother, yes :(

He lives outside, so he can reach his office easily compare to live uniten which is more costly.

and how about me?

InsyaAllah, I still stay on campus, my housemates are 2 sudanese and 1 bangladesh. please people, do treat me well!

Angin Perubahan

Aku sedih jikalau menggambarkannya, imanku bagai bunga padi yang mudah tertiup angin.

Aku malu dengan Allah, aku malu.

Aku hanya meminta kenikmatan saja, dengan enggan bersyukur, seakan-akan nikmat itu tanpa ada yg memberi,tanpa ada yang mencipta.

Aku yang selalu mengeluh jika mencicipi sedikit ujian yang Ia beri.

Aku juga punya dosa yang tak terkira banyaknya. Tapi bolehkah aku mengharap surga yang abadi kelak?

Aku jadi teringat untaian lembut tapi mengena dari Ibnu Athailla.

Bisa jadi Allah membuka pintu ketaatan bagimu, tetapi tidak membuka pintu pengabulan (diterimanya ketaatan itu). Boleh jadi Allah menakdirkanmu berbuat dosa, tetapi ternyata itu menjadi penyebab sampainya tujuan (kepadaNya).

Plak! Ya aku tertampar untuk hitungan yang aku tak sanggup lagi untuk sekedar mengingatnya, mungkin karena terlalu sering. Allah sungguh sayang akan hamba-hambaNya, Ia sangat sayang. Allah selalu menegurku, dan ini sudah teguran yang entah keberapa Allah berikan kepadaku.

Optimis, bahwa setelah gelap pasti ada terang, setelah ada kesusahan pasti ada kemudahan. Fainna maal usri yusro inna maal usri yusro. Mungkin, Allah tak ingin membiarkanku menjadi insan yang biasa. Ya aku ingin berubah, tapi perlahan (huehehe), aku sangat lamban dalam beradaptasi untuk perubahan, oleh karena itu terkadang ku berfikir berulang kali.

Alhamdulillah, selama ini aku bisa merasakan perubahan yang aku jalani, walaupun memang masih lamban. Tapi bukankah perubahan ke arah lebih baik itu harus? Hatta sebesar biji zarrah. Perubahan itu harus, pasti dan ada.

Bukankah harapan tanpa keyakinan itu kosong?

Malaysia, 18 Januari 2011.